Genderless
Having no gender at all, as a plain fact rather than a gap.
Genderless means having no gender. Not a small one, not an uncertain one: none. It sits alongside agender, and the two are often used interchangeably, though some people prefer genderless because it states an absence rather than naming a category.
The usual misunderstanding is that an absence must feel like a loss. Most genderless people describe it as unremarkable, in the way that not having a favourite colour is unremarkable.
It says nothing about presentation. A genderless person may look entirely conventional, entirely androgynous, or anything else, because gender identity and gender expression are separate questions.
Genderless is not an empty space where a gender should be
It is heard as a deficiency, as though something were missing that ought to be there. People who use it generally report the opposite: nothing is missing, because nothing was ever there.
It is also not the same as being unsure. Questioning is a different word for a different state, and genderless is an answer rather than a pause.
Saying it well
Say this
- I am genderless.
- No gender, rather than an uncertain one.
- Genderless, and I dress however I like.
- Agender and genderless mean much the same thing to me.
Not this
- So you are neither male nor female underneath
- Everyone has a gender really
- So you are confused
- You are just a tomboy
Questions people actually ask
What does genderless mean?
Having no gender at all.
Is genderless the same as agender?
They overlap almost entirely. Genderless states an absence, agender names a category, and many people use both.
Does genderless mean androgynous?
No. That describes presentation, which is a separate question from identity.