Enbian
A nonbinary person attracted to other nonbinary people, whether or not only to them.
Enbian describes a nonbinary person who is attracted to other nonbinary people. It also works as an adjective for a relationship between nonbinary people. The attraction does not have to be exclusive: an enbian may be drawn to other genders as well.
It is built from enby, the spoken form of NB, with the ending -ian. The Tumblr blog bigendering posted it on 6 August 2016, defining it as a nonbinary person attracted, exclusively or not, to nonbinary people, or in a relationship that contains no binary individuals. The post compared it to sapphic and achillean, with two differences: it covers all nonbinary genders rather than one, and it works as a noun.
Definitions differ at the edges. Wiktionary's adjective sense says preferring nonbinary partners mostly or exclusively, while its noun sense, the original post and the LGBTQIA+ Wiki all leave exclusivity open. The LGBTQIA+ Wiki files enbian under diamoric orientations and lists NBLNB, nonbinary loving nonbinary, as another name for it, along with rarer coinages such as cypric.
It belongs to the same family as NBLW. NBLW is a nonbinary person attracted to women; enbian is a nonbinary person attracted to nonbinary people. Neither rules out the other, and a nonbinary person can be sapphic and enbian at once, since sapphic is about attraction to women and enbian about attraction to nonbinary people.
Not every nonbinary person attracted to nonbinary people uses it. The Trans Language Primer notes that some avoid the word because it sounds tied to lesbian identity, and some find the link to enby condescending. Diamoric and NBLNB cover the same ground without either association.
Enbian is not a nonbinary word for lesbian
The ending makes it sound like lesbian, and it gets read as a version of it. It is a different claim. Lesbian is about attraction to women; enbian is about attraction to nonbinary people. Some nonbinary people are lesbians, some are enbian, and some are both.
It is also not a promise of exclusivity. The first definition said exclusively or not, and most glossaries still leave it open. Someone who calls themselves enbian has told you who they are drawn to, not who they refuse to date.
Saying it well
Say this
- I am enbian.
- An enbian relationship: two enbies, no binary genders involved.
- Enbian, and into women too.
- Enbian, or NBLNB if you prefer the acronym.
Not this
- So you are a nonbinary lesbian
- Enbian, so you only date enbies
- Calling someone enbian who has not used the word
- Which one of you is the girl?
Questions people actually ask
What does enbian mean?
A nonbinary person attracted to other nonbinary people, not necessarily exclusively. It can also describe a relationship between nonbinary people.
Who coined the word enbian?
The Tumblr blog bigendering, which posted it on 6 August 2016.
Is enbian the same as lesbian?
No. Lesbian is about attraction to women, enbian about attraction to nonbinary people. A person can be both.
What is the difference between enbian and NBLW?
Both describe a nonbinary person's attraction. NBLW means attraction to women; enbian means attraction to nonbinary people.
Do enbians only date nonbinary people?
Not necessarily. Most definitions, including the original one, say the attraction can be exclusive or not.