Aegosexual
Enjoying sexual material while feeling no desire to take part.
Aegosexual describes a disconnect between enjoying sexual content and wanting any of it yourself. Someone aegosexual may read, watch or fantasise with real interest, while feeling no pull toward doing any of it with another person.
The fantasies typically have no self in them. People describe watching rather than participating, or imagining strangers rather than themselves, which is what separates it from ordinary private fantasy.
It sits on the asexual spectrum and was previously called autochorissexual, a clinical coinage that the community replaced with something less like a diagnosis.
It is one of the most misunderstood words here, because the existence of a libido is taken as proof that the asexuality is not real. Libido and attraction to people are different things, and aegosexuality is exactly the case that demonstrates it.
A libido is not attraction to people
The objection is that wanting anything sexual disproves asexuality, which collapses two separate things into one.
Libido is a drive. Sexual attraction is directed at people. Aegosexual people commonly have the first and not the second, which is unremarkable once the two are kept apart.
Saying it well
Say this
- I am aegosexual.
- I enjoy it and I do not want it.
- The fantasies do not have me in them.
- Libido, yes. Attraction to people, no.
Not this
- Then you are not really asexual
- So you are just repressed
- If you watch it you must want it
- That is a contradiction
Questions people actually ask
What does aegosexual mean?
Enjoying sexual content or fantasy while feeling no desire to participate.
Is aegosexual part of the asexual spectrum?
Yes.
Does having a libido contradict being asexual?
No. Libido is a drive; sexual attraction is directed at people. They are separate.
What was the older term?
Autochorissexual, a clinical coinage the community replaced.